about internship application

just replied the guy from internship company to decline his offer and recommended my groupmate to him. few minutes later she got one email from him. he said that the reason why he sent email to ask me first "is that his resume indicates his experiences in ...", and he asked her to "tell me more about your research work".

my boss asked us this morning: why you couldn't go but got the offer while she can but not? i think the guy's email explained it somehow. this is a different position with the one we got phone interviewed at last time and they didnt know that i can't go so they reviewed our application at the same time and make the order.

i think resume and cover letter are important documents for job hunting. and of course another, maybe even more important factor is the recommendation from someone in or connecting with that company.

last year i spent one whole week in preparing my resume and cover letter, with the revising help from my advisor and career center and my friends. i longed for internship very much at that time. but since nobody recommended me, i couldnt get an offer. none of those applicants from my department got it although we are among the top in that field.

this time i also spent about half a week to prepare the resume and cover letter, although i just needed to change from my previous version. i asked my friend: can you give me your sample of colver letter? to my surprise he told me he didn't have it. he is looking for job. he said that the companies only require resume. yes i haven't seen any company asking for cover letter directly. but i think it should be useful to demonstrate myself by cover letter along with resume. after that my friend sent cl to his application too.

my groupmate wants to go to industry in the future and internship is important for her. but she is just careless or idle. she just modified her last year resume and sent to the company one day after we got the internship info. when i asked her about cover letter it's too late for her to make up it. i am not sure how important the documents play role in the application but i think at least this time it's important: the guy asked me whether i will go since "You seem to have good experiences in this area" and he asked my groupmate to describe her research more. i believe that it's not b/c i m doing better than her, but b/c she didn't show her abilities well and clearly
in her resume while i did.

today Los Alamos National Lab is looking for graduate internships from our department (via a joint program, working at our department and paid by LANL. my boss still said no to me). i helped my groupmate to revise her email. her english is pretty good but she is careless in my eyes in writing. and she still wrote in chinese mail style and she seldom checked her writing before she sent it. i asked her to be careful since she care about this application and position very much.

a bad thing about careful is wasting time. i wish i can learn to be efficient and careful in the future.

phone interview

just finished the phone interview from internship company. my first one at usa. about 25 minutes.

i am still in cold and couldnt speak clearly. my research matches their topics a little, not much. but in my eyes it's easy for me to get into theirs.

he asked me about the frontiers of my field (also theirs) and we discussed. he wanted "advanced researchers who are familiar with these work". but that's a high requirement for intern.

we talked about the difference between academia and industry research.

the problem is that they want me to go for 6 or 9 months. i cant since i need to work on my dissertation and graduate. in fact my advisor told me that he is "thinking whether it's good or not to let you go in the summer instead of working here with me". i'm also hesitated.

he asked me to think about the possibility to postpone my graduation. i dont think it's acceptable for me and my advisor. i will reply him next week.

anyway, it's a good experience for me to be interviewed.

friend came

Everyday I arrived school around 9:30am and I went to mailroom first. It happened today morning when I was sitting outside the mailroom and reading some seminar announcement. I saw a post about my friend's talk at afternoon. When I was reading it, I heard a voice coming. It's a conservation by my advisor and my friend. Then they saw me.

My advisor asked me: so you are the classmate? I answered yes. We were from the same class when we were undergraduate. After we graduated with bachelor degree, I stayed in PKU to continue my graduate study and he came directly to usa and entered graduate school. He finished his phd in four years and now he has been working as a postdoc for two and half years. He is looking for a tenure track position in my depeartment and others.

When I think about him and some other classmates, I know that I am far behind now. I cannot say that I wasted three years for the graduate study at PKU, because I did learn something there. But I didn't work hard enough after I came here. That's why I am not good now. I need to catch up.

After the talk at afternoon, my advisor asked me again: so you were in the same grade before? I said yes. He was wondering why my friend graduated at two years ago while I am not yet. He told me: well, work harder then.

I will.

I Promised Myself

I happenly saw this one from a forum and I think it's worthful to read.

I Promised Myself
by Christina D. Larson.

Today and everyday of my eternal life, I promise myself to be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person I meet.

To make my friends feel that there is something beautiful in each one of them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true.

To think only the best and expect only the best. To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.

To forgive and forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievement of the future.

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature I meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of myself that I have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, too happy to permit the presence of trouble. And so it is!"

答应自己
克里斯顿·拉尔森

答应自己——

将如此坚强，任何东西都不能扰乱内心的静谧

和见到的每一个人谈到的都是关于健康

幸福和舒畅

让所有的朋友都感到各有所长

任何事物都能窥见其光明的一面

使你的快乐信条处处应验

只想令人快感的事情仅盼最让人欣慰的结局

对别人的成功像对自己的成功报以同样的欢呼

忘却以往的过失，义无返顾的争取更大的建树

将永远面带一种愉悦向所有遇到的生灵送上一份可心的笑意

将如此忙于完善自己，而无暇对他人吹毛求疵

将过于豁达，不会忧郁

过于高贵，不屑动气

过于硬朗，不知畏惧

过于快活，不容心存芥蒂

back

Well, I am at LA again now. When I typed the title "back", I don't know whether it's appropriate or not, since I "back to China" and "back to LA", both "back". But it doesn't matter. I'm here again and when I saw my roommates and my bedroom, I felt that I have been back to home.

I miss my family in China. Yes, a lot now. One day ago I was being with my parents, but the plane was so fast that just after one day we are separated by the Pacific again. It's not easy to see them again in a short future. Visa is the biggest problem, and another problem is money.

About my winter vacation at China, it's fine. I went to Beijing to visit my godmother. She was so happy to see me there. But I was sorry to find that she got older a little much. She retired from her job and now spent her time in learning drawing, dancing and other. It's good for her to be kept in busy since in that way she won't feel too lonely. I wish my godmother keep a good health.

After staying at Beijing for couple days I went back to home. I am very sorry that I didn't go to the workshop at Hangzhou. I couldn't make it at that time. I took plane from Beijing to Fuzhou. My parents had been waiting at airport for more than two hours. It's the first time that my mother went to airport. She told me later that she couldn't find the airplane at airport. I asked her and my dad to come with me to Shanghai when I leave from China to LA, but they refused, saying that it's too cold to go there in winter. I know that they are economic and don't want me to spend much money.

When I saw my parents at the airport, I found that they became much older than before, especially my mother. I felt guilty for myself since I didn't care about them enough. I should go back home earlier and more often before to visit them. Although I noted later that my mother was old that day mainly because she was too tired after 3 hours ride and 2 hours waiting, I still felt that they are older than before. They did a lot of work at my hometown. They explained to me why they insisted to work so hard: you are still a student and your brother and sister and yourself need a lot of money in the coming future for marriage and housing. They are traditional Chinese parents: care about kids a lot and care about themselves too little. I told them that I am also working as a student and can afford my future and help my younger brother and sister as well. I asked them to work less and keep them more healthy. Health is the most wanted gift I want my parents to get and hold.

I didn't visit any other city after I went back home. I spent most of my time with my parents and also visited some relatives and friends. I know that it's harder to find a long vacation in the future to spend with them. I love my parents a lot. They also love me a lot. I missed an important mission in my vacation. But overall, my vacation is fine since I was so happy with my parents and they were happy too.

I am a little tired now. I just knew that tomorrow is a holiday. It's good that I can take some rest. But since this is the second week of winter quarter, I need to get over jetlag asap and catch up with my course and work. I have been away for one month. It's time to work hard now.

2005, a new year, a new life.

country road, take me home ...

well, it has been almost two months since I wrote at here last time. I just finished a very busy quarter. Tonight (I don't know whether I should say yesterday or today since it's 3am now and I am still here) I finished grading of one final exam at midnight. Thanks to my friend Eric, I can leave proctoring and grading of the other exam to him. I just updated my teaching webpage and also my homepage to say happy holiday to all my students and friends. If you happenly read this post, then my greeting is also sent to you.

Six hours later I will wake up and go to airport. From there I will return my homeland. I am sorry to my parents that I have been away from them for a very long time. I know that they are missing me very much but this time I need to go Beijing and Hangzhou first for a couple of days, before I go back home to be with them. I am missing my parents, brother and sister too.

Am I excited now because of going back home? Not exactly. I am not sure why I am still here instead of sleeping. I just found that I have many things to do before I lay down on bed.

I will stay in Beijing for three days and my schedule at there is almost full now. I need to meet with my friends such as my college classmates and my teachers, also of course, my godmother there. I also need to help my friends at here to sent their gifts to their family or friends from Beijing. And I also need to do some shopping, for my friends and I. I just bring a few sets of clothes this time since I want to buy some new ones in China, to update my closet.

Today (or yesterday, whatever, Tuesday) my advisor sent me an email about one new idea on research. I am sorry that I didnt get his email in time that I miss the meeting he asked. From him I know that to be a good or famous scholar you need to be unique: he even think about research few hours before he leaving for a conference travel. He always works so hard and a lot of new idea came out from his genius brain. It's my fourth year studying at here with him but I just learned a little so far. I need to work much harder to obtain more training. I hope that after this vacation I will start a brand new life.

Ok, it's time for sleeping. I will be in China in 24 hours. Hope that everything goes as smooth as I wish.

And happy holiday to all my friends.

back home

I just purchased the airticket for this winter trip. It's so expensive since my itinerary is in the hot season. If I can leave one week earlier or ten days later, I will save about $300 on the ticket. But it seems I don't have many choices.

My friends told me that I should regret for my decision of being TA at this quarter. I know that. Being a TA in this quarter means: lower salary (as RA I can get the highest rank of salary but as TA what I get is lowest rank), very busy and tough work (more than half-time since one class is about double of the regular capacity and the other is also full), non-flexible time schedule (which directly makes my winter vacation not flexible), boss unsatisfied (since I can't concentrate on my research completely), other students unsatisfied (since I took the position), etc. But it's my decision. I wanted to gather one more quarter teaching experience and hoped that it will help for my future work.

I felt so tired these weeks since I was so busy. Many works including my research and teaching are waiting for me. Last Sunday I spent whole day for homework grading and class notes preparation. Yes I was a little regretful when I was exhausted and when I found that the airticket is so expensive. But I cannot blame anyone or regret for any chance. What I can do is to stay firm with my choice and fulfil all the work in this quarter well. Hope that I can do that.

Boss told me that I can attend one conference in China during my vacation. But he won't support for my airfare from here to China. I didn't expect much to get the money. He said that I can get reimbursement for the airticket in China if I take American airline. But it's hard for me. So I may pay all the expense by myself. It's bad to be poor, since otherwise I will not care about the expense at all.

I chose to fly to Shanghai. It's close to my hometown. But I will also go to Beijing for a while. I plan to visit my godmother and my graduate advisor and some old friends as well in Beijing. When I thought about the coming travel back to my hometown and Beijing, I was not very excited, but somehow with a strange feeling. Maybe it's similar with a Chinese saying that "I am more and more afraid when I am getting closer and closer to the home". I miss my parents very much. And I also miss the time I spent in Beijing. I had been in Beijing for seven years and I went back to it after my first year at USA. I had so many memories with Beijing but I just couldn't recall them any more. When I was in Beijing that summer after one week, I felt lonely in my heart. It may sound rediculous to other people. But it was true. I couldn't find myself in that busy city. When I came back from Beijing to here at last time, I couldn't help tearing on the plane, since I was leaving my homeland to another country for a new life. I was so emotional at that time. Time goes by and everyday is new to me now.

Hope that I can finish all my work before my travel and then I can be free to enjoy the holiday. I am looking forward to seeing my parents and friends in China now.

visa

too busy to record.

I went to Tijuana on Friday and renewed my visa. It's simple for me at this time. My math background and luck helped me to get it easily. Now I need to plan my winter vacation to China.

teaching day

I just finished my teaching today. It's a full day work. tired ...

2a, finished two sections homework. one more to go for first assignment.
9:30a, meeting with the instructor, discussing the course, class and student performance etc.;
10a/11a, class 1;
11a/1p, office hours; in fact I finished at 1:20p;
lunch;
2p/3p, class 2.

It's the first week of this quarter and second week of my teaching and first week of office hours in this quarter. Many students came to the office hours and I didn't stop for a minute. It seems (and I strongly believe) that the homework assignment is too much for the students. They need to finish more than 20 problems each week. And it's upper division course, which is not easy for the students. Some students complained to me. But what I can is only giving some feedback to the instructors since it's them determined the homework assignment.

In the evaluation of my last teaching, the students gave me good points. But some of them complained that my teaching is too fast for them. I used 20 minutes biweekly for the quiz and I didn't have enough time for teaching my stuff. This time I am trying to slow down and explain everything in detail. But it seems that the time is still too short for my teaching. I will try to teaching less in the class and write more in the notes, with which the students can preview/review by themselves.

It's a busy and tired day. Now I need to come back for my own work.

Weekend and Monday

Yesterday:

Finally I activated my cable internet and I can get connected at home. It's so bad to send email with attachment through dial-up. But I used dial-up for more than two years and I didn't complain about the slow speed at that time. Well, it just proved again the words: easy to get used to a rich life from poor life, but hard to get used to a poor life from a rich one.

My cell phone plan expired at yesterday. I haven't decided which plan I will buy for future. At most time, cellphone is just a watch and alarm to me. But I think I can't get rid of it now.

Today:

Monday, work at school again. I met with the instructor of my TA class. He told me that it may not be legal to release the homework solutions online. But last Fall I did in that way and the instructor of that class also released some solutions to the homework assignments. I don't think it's illegal. After lunch I created the webpage for the two classes I will teach from this Thursday. I haven't started to prepare the notes for the classes. But usually in the first week (in fact, this is 0th week), I don't need to teach many in the class, because the students haven't taken any lecture classes before my class in 0th week.

Oops, I forgot to get back my I20. It's ready now. Go le.

TA assignment and etc.

I got the new TA assignment. Thanks to the help of Eric, I exchanged one class with him and I will teach two ODE classes in the coming Fall quarter. It will help me to save time in preparation. I will be busier next quarter, so the new assignment will be perfect for me.

I applied for Comcast cable TV and high speed internet. They may be ready in next week. Without internet, the life at home is different. But it doesn't affect me much. I has been so tired these days in the moving and applying services and many other work. The research duty is also heavy. I need to work harder. Last two nights I went to bed before midnight. For me, it's a early time for sleeping. So tired.

Jason and Linda moved into the new office yesterday. Now we have seven people share the new office at IPAM. I will keep the office at MS since I need to hold my office hour as TA at there. That office was crowdy since my officemate was so nice to students that he gave them lots of extra office hours. I couldn't concentrate myself in that office. That's one of the reasons I moved to IPAM.

It's weekend again. Time flies so fast. Tomorrow I will go to Santa Babara to visit a friend and his family. He was my college classmate and he went studying abroad after getting his bachelor degree. He is an assistant professor at UCSB now. Some of my college classmates are postdoc or assistant professors now. I am behind.

two things this afternoon

1. reserved an appointment for visa renewal at Mexico on Oct. 15th. somebody from UCLA will go to there at the same day.

2. got the TA assignment. same as last Fall, ODE and Numerical Analysis. I may talk with my friend and try to change NA with his ODE, so that I can teach one course only.

new address

I have moved to the new apartment. Oh, maybe I should say new address, since the apt is about 30 years old, not new. It's repainted, clean, and spacious. Not bad. The three things I am not satisfied are: the dirty laundary, small mailbox, and no fan in the kitchen.

Moving is a big project and now it's almost finished. I applied the new accounts for the gas, power, phone. I'm looking for the deal of cable tv and broadband. The life without internet is a little strange to me since I am used to living with internet, or maybe worse, addict to it. Today I sent out some rebate forms with the new address on it. And I submitted the address change in post office, updated address info for all the credit cards and etc. There're still many things I need to do, such as submitting AR-11 form, changing address in DMV, notifing my friends for the address change, etc.

But the most difficult part has already been done. It's not easy to move all the boxes, furnitures, and especially the heavy refrigerator. My previous roommate left here 21 boxes books, unbelivable lots of kitchen stuff, and bunch of kid's stuff. Thanks to the effort of my roommates and two good friends and the god, everything went smoothly. I was worried about how to put all of the stuffs in the apt since we don't have gated garage any more, but finally everything found its palce. When I was laying on my big bed (thanks to Wei Zhu for this gift), I felt so relaxed: hum, this is my new place now.

The new quarter is coming. I haven't received the assignment for the TA work. But I'm hopefully to teach ODE again. I prepared detail notes last Fall when I taught this course. It will help me to save time and be more efficiently. I want to be a good TA, that's why I choose TAship this quarter instead of RAship. Hope that I will have enough time and energy on both my teaching and research. I am working in a new office which is close to the office of my advisor. It "helps to keep me pushed".

New address, new quarter, new beginning.

911

Today:

(1) the 3rd anniversary of Sept. 11.

(2) I am moving out of the place where I have been for 33 months to a new place. It's hard to say goodbye ... I haven't applied telephone and cable TV and internet for the the new apartment. I'll have a life away from internet at this weekend.

going home

My friend told me that she booked one airticket to China today. I am also thinking about going back home this winter. And it's time to book the ticket for affordable price.

I planed several times before for the travel back to home. But, I changed all of the plans. My young sister told me in kidding: "don't tell us that you plan to come back in the coming holiday, you have already made us disappointed too many times". My bad ...

Now I am seriously thinking of the travel in this winter. I can not get every thing as good as I expected. In the verse, many things are not good to me. I will be TA in Fall quarter so I can't leave early (possible, if the instructors allow me to ask my friends work as me temporarily, but too complicated). The Fall quarter will end at Dec 17th, which is Friday. And I may only be able to leave from Dec 18th. The airticket will be expensive since it's close to X'mas. And the worse is that the holiday will be very short. The Winter quarter will start from Jan 6th. But I plan to come back a little later, if I will be RA in winter as scheduled.

Another thing is about visa renewal. I am not sure whether I can find someone else going together to TJ to renew the visa. If not, I have to renew it in China. And I may go to Beijing or Guangzhou or Shanghai. I haven't decided my destination yet. I am not worry much about the possibility of being checked in visa renewal, but if I go to renew in China, I have to spend several days in another city before I go back home. The holiday will be even shorter.

So many things are undetermined. But no matter what will happen, I will go back home this time. My advisor told me at last month after he came back from a conference in China: you should go back to take a look, China has changed a lot. I know it. And I don't want to make my parents and friends disappointed again. After I graduate and start working, I will have even less chance to go back China, not only because of the length of holiday period, but also because of the difficulty of renewing visa for Chinese.

I am planning to set down my schedule and book the airticket soon.

three years ago

I arrived LAX at noon of Sept. 7th. Wow, I have already been in USA for three years. But I cannot say how much I have learned at here. I was just lazy and I didn't work hard enough.

At that summer I missed the summer school which started from August. It's a review course for the new Basic exam. I thought the exam is just piece of cake for me. But I didn't eat it well. I failed at the first time since I didn't prepare well and most of the questions are from my freshman courses. What a shame that I failed in such an easy exam. I dared not tell my friends. It's good that finally I passed it with a high score at the second chance.

There's an earthquake at the second day after I came here. I am not sure whether my first SPEAK exam is on Sept. 11th or 12th. It should be on 11th since no one worked on 12th. Sept. 11th, what a special date. I still remember that in the morning I called my friend in China as usual and was told: TWO PLANES CRASHED INTO THE WTC!!! Astonished? Not at the beginning. I just couldn't believe it. How could I? I turned on the TV. All the channels were in live show. Astonished! I woke up the other two roommates and we were all shocked. I went to school and then took the exam. I was not nervous in the exam at all since I knew I would fail in the first try, as my friends told me. I remembered that after the exam I sent an email in media room of the library.

It happened three years ago. I have been here for three years. No time can be reversed. But when I look back into the past, some of them seem to happen just at yesterday. Last night I watched CNN. It was broadcasting the terrorist tragedy which happened at Russia few days ago. What a tragedy! Terrorists killed women and children. They are so cruel and inhumane. All the terrorists should be annihilated forever from this world. I talked with my roommate. There may be one person felt happy for this tragedy. That's GWB. He will say: see, what I attacked on terrorism is correct. This may help him to win the Vote 2004.

September is a special month for me since there're some special events happened to me. I am not good in memorizing but every time when I found it's "the date", I recalled something happened before. But, no time can be reversed. All the memories belong to the past. Life goes on and on.

I just realized that 10 years ago, in the morning of Sept. 7th, I arrived Beijing for the first time. What a special date for me!

Hope that I will have many better than better Septembers.

pictures from Beijing

Today I got an email from my GanMa (godmother). She sent me some pictures taken by her recently. They remind me the fall of Beijing. In the university I attended, there were some beautiful pools full of water lily at this season. (I think it's on August, not September). The waterlily is so beautiful that many students sit around the pool at this season. I am not sure whether I will visit Beijing this winter or go back to home directly. But Beijing is always a special city in my memory.


water lily in the Summer Palace, Beijing, China, taken at September 2004


Sunset, Beijing. taken at September 2004

moving

I got the keys for my new apt at this morning. Now I am ready to move. I plan to move some boxes (of books) first and then move the furniture at this weekend.

This Labor's day is really a labor day for me. My roommates and I packed the books which belong to my previous roommate. Those books filled 20 medium size boxes! And not all, there's still one shelf we didn't notice. The book boxes are so heavy that we plan to move by ourselves before the weekend, when our friends will come to help us for moving.

Now I need to sell the bookshelves. I also want to sell my desktops but I don't think anyone will give me a good price. I have one laptop and two desktops at home. Too much and I seldom used them. I set one desktop as Linux server.

Moving is not easy. Many things are waiting to be done ahead. Packaging, cleaning, U-haul, etc. …

pictures posted via picasa hello

It's convenient to post pictures via Picasa Hello. I started to use it from today and put some of the old pictures here.


Water Tower Place, Chicago. taken at April 2003.


Michigan lake, Chicago, taken at April 2003.


NYC. taken at April 2003.


The city I am living in, taken at April 2003. Back from east coast.


Castaic lake. CA. taken at June 2004. BBQ.


Royce Hall, UCLA. taken at August 2004. Hooding ceremony of my friends.

craigslist

Since I will move at next weekend, I need some moving boxes. Today I checked craigslist.com and I found some info in the free stuff board. I was so happy that one lady answered my call and told me that I could get her moving boxes for free. I took it with my friends.

I think American people are nice, at least sometimes. I saw many free stuff info at cragslist. People can throw away their used boxes or other stuffs directly and easily. But sometime they don't. They post the info online and other people who need those stuffs can go and take it, for free. There're some really nice people. I am so grateful for the generosity of that lady. We gave her a Chinese gauze scarf as thank-you gift.

I got to know cragislist few weeks ago. I checked the housing info at there. It helped to find the apt I will move to soon. Thanks to the facility of internet and the nice people.

The link of cragslist: http://www.craigslist.com/